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The Wandering WebWhore is my personal blog. I'm a 30-something indie pornographer whose journal covers a variety of topics: mundane daily life, work-related reflection, sex stuff, current events, and more. MY SITE FEED 
(outdated) F.A.Q.s About this blog OUR INDIE PORN SITES:  My Personal Porn Site  My Boyfriend's Site  My Girlfriend's Site  My Menstruation Site  All our sites combined. 
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Thursday, April 06, 2006
V for Vendetta
V FOR VENDETTA We wound up seeing V for Vendetta the other night; Amberlily & Davie, you were right! We loved it!  Note phallus above. You probably knew I would love it because so many men were wearing black gloves, but on top of that the movie was thrilling, provocative, inspired, and impassioned. I could have done without Natalie Portman's fakey accent, but I'm *so* glad they didn't hire that goddamned Scarlett Johansson for the part of Evey. I couldn't have stood to see her slack bloated-with-boredom expression deadening the film. Natalie conveys a sense of urgency that Scarlett never could. It's a shame knowing they probably didn't use Scarlett NOT because she would cast a heavy shadow of slothful dead weight over the movie, but simply because her large breasts and mature figure wouldn't have worked well in the Lol. scene. Note: I have to abbreviate the word Lolxxx because just using that word on my porn site could get me blacklisted by my payment processor -- fucking retarded, right? Maybe I will create a series of text-based graphics that won't be read by search engines for the words bestxxxxxx, xape, incxxx, and Dept. of Justxxx. As a pornographer I've come to view almost everything I observe in the media, politics, etc. through the EYES of a pornographer. I don't just mean that I see and hear kinky things everywhere and sexualize things a non-pornographer would never perceive as sexual (though I do all of that quite a bit, but I'm not sure that's because I'm a pornographer or if I'm a pornographer because I've always done those things). What I mean is that I look at everything through the lens of a passionate pornographer's and whore's resentment that her freedoms cannot be taken for granted. My work, my body, my freedom to express myself, my right to privacy and to pursue happiness, my punishment for breaking the law -- ALL of those things are subject to irrational moralistic hypocritical misogynistic ignorant double-standards. When I watch movies, listen to music, watch television, listen to people talking on the streets, hear advertisements, read the news and listen to politicians it goes through my whore-filter and my pornographer-filter. I watch and I listen for the meaning everything has for a sex worker, particularly a webwhore such as myself. I am sensitive to obscenity, something I see and hear and read about every day OUTSIDE of the adult industry but is a term only applied to porn and the most threatening of art and commentary. That stupid pompous self-righteous smirk on George W's face that refuses to apologize for shitting all over the people he's supposed to SERVE? Five billion times more obscene than me sticking my fist in my twat. But in tandem with the Department of "Justice" there's a whole FBI squad devoted to hunting down people like me and putting us in prison while our filthy "president" gets away with treason and continues to It feels good to watch a movie that applies to me. V for Vendetta champions everyone's rights and urges EVERYONE to be vigilant, but it's also one of those rare mainstream movies that actually applies, albeit subtly and perhaps without intention, to me as a whore and a pornographer because it addressed and exhibited "obscene" sexually charged art, sexuality, and political criticism all as targets for arrest/imprisonment/punishment by a corrupt, abusive, totalitarian government justifying its lies and abuses as "for our own good". Let me tell you, it was a breath of fresh air after so many years of Tom-Clancy-in-Hollywood and Air-Force-One style propaganda. It's completely unamerican for so many of us NOT to be riled up NOT to be protesting NOT to (for one example) have anyone organizing for us to throw Walmart's imports overboard into the fucking drink. I know those containers are a lot heavier than tea, but come on. V for Vendetta reminds us that blowing shit up IS patriotic. It's amazing that such a violent group of people as ourselves is so unwilling to embrace civil disobedience. I'm not making any excuses for myself -- the only destructive acts of protest I've felt like engaging in were to find a way to break in and destroy the black box voting machines, but no one invited me on such a party and apparently no one has been bold enough to do it (at least, not that I've heard of). It seems like such an obvious and vital step to me, though. I would probably spontaneously combust if someone wanted me to use one of those fraudulent vote-thieving pieces of election-fixing shit. Sigh. I don't really want to live in a country torn by chaos and violent explosions (see also: Iraq). I just can't believe we've gotten to this place, and I truly feel like it can't be fixed peacefully (or with violence either) without starting over from scratch with a well-funded education system for the next generation. I really have no hope for my country as long as so many of us are happily operating at the intellectual level of morons. I've had almost zero desire to make inflammatory posts like this one since the last election because it feels almost entirely futile. It only makes a few people happy to read it, and they are the ones who agree. Seems like a waste of time preaching to the choir, and it gives me a headache. If I thought anything I said could actually convince people, I'd try harder, but I'm not sure I have the fortitude, the time, the talent, or the intelligence to present information and argments that the unconvinced could grasp (and wouldn't immediately tune out due to my aggressive presentation). I don't know where to start, so I keep going back to starting with more money. I don't think it's possible to "win" without more money and resources backing us up. For me to sit around blogging about political issues seems like a pathetic exercise in futility, one that depresses and angers me. Over the past year or so I've felt guilty every so often for being so fluffy, for ignoring so much of what's been going on, but I've pretty much concluded that my first job is to make more money. Even if I never get "rich", at least I could take a year off of the more humdrum time-consuming aspects of webwhoring to read and write and learn more, better arming myself to manifest more positive changes. Note: I'm sure Scarlett Johansson is a fine human being and not nearly as stupid as she looks, and I did actually enjoy her in ONE role (in the movie The Man Who Wasn't There, and that because of the car scene). I'm sorry I spew such negativity her way, but I just can't abide the sight of her. Oh . . . I enjoyed the slight gender ambiguities in "V". It's funny looking at the poster for Mildred Pierce in the photo above, because I thought V had a mildly Joan Crawfordesque style, infused with a sort of stately amazonian femdom fagginess, sort of Captain Hook meets Robin Hood. It was hot. The movie wasn't perfect, though. In addition to the crappy Portman accent I groaned a bit near the end when people in the crowd took off their Guy Fawkes masks to reveal individuals who DIED during the story. That struck me as cheesy and melodramatic (but not in a good way, like V's speeches). Whatever . . . it was good enough that we hope to see it again while it's still in the theatre. 
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1 Comments:
I share your feelings of frustration and futility, Trixie. Of wanting to manifest a better world, but feeling, after a glance around, that you're so very alone in your thinking, that there's no community heading in the direction you'd like to be heading in for you to be a part of. That the sorry excuses for community that do manifest are heading in such sorry directions.
That's how I feel, anyway. (Not to put words in your [virtual] mouth.)
--
I used to journal online, in the days before the software that makes blogging so easy now. This post of yours is the second thing this week that's put me in mind of my feeling that between November, 2000 and September 11, 2001, I didn't seize upon near enough opportunities to refer publicly to W as Pretendident.
Remember that 2000 election? Remember all the terms people came up with to express their ...opinions of the outcome? 'Commander in Thief,' and so on? 'Pretendident' was my own invention, and I shelved it, as all the others were shelved, with the attacks. I thought it at best unconstructive under the new circumstances, and unlikely to convince anyone of anything, unlikely to win minds, as it were.
Say, remember the headline the Onion ran back then: Congress Resolves Bush No Longer an Idiot? It's a headline that you won't find in the online archives, by the way, because The Onion pulled their Sept 19, 2001, issue.
See, there's something that gets me down: even the professional satirists lack the courage of their own conviction. But I digress.
My point is that I shut my dissenting mouth back then, and these days I feel (like you?) at an abject loss over how to open my mouth in a constructive way. Because I want more than merely to disagree with what wrongs are going on, I want the wrongs to stop going on and I want good things to start going on and I want to contribute to their going on.
I guess I feel I'm treading water rather than trying to swim against the tide, because, Lord knows, I feel powerless to, y'know, turn the tide, which is what I'd really prefer to see happen.
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